A Question for the Guys Out There

I can completely understand the lure of physical beauty, especially as we get older; to feel firm, young flesh and gaze upon physical perfection….yep, got all that but when you see these old rich guys with their young model wives I really can’t help but wonder – what on earth do they talk about?

I can imagine, for the first couple of months, there will be the ‘getting to know you’ phase so they’ll be able to discuss past experiences and future dreams. However, the guy’s life experiences could span the last 6 decades whereas the girl’s might only be 2 (with only 2 years as an adult) so you have an immediate disparity. The girl could, genuinely, be interested in hearing about the guy’s history but I can’t imagine that she could have any real understanding and, conversely, how could he relate to the stories of a 20 year old? As for future dreams, we all have them but the realistic expectations of a 60 or 70 year old are far removed from each other. Is it a case of living vicariously?  A 20 year old can, potentially gain much wisdom from spending time with someone 3 times her age and an older man could gain renewed vitality from being around someone with an abundance of youthful energy but can they ever really meet in the middle as equals?

PUBLISHED by catsmob.comI hugely admire people who really don’t care what society thinks of them and if these older men and young women find happiness together who am I to criticise their life choices BUT I believe that there always needs to be an initial physical attraction between people for them to want to spend more time in each other’s company. I can quite understand a 70 year old grandfather being physically attracted to a 20 year old lingerie model but I really can’t see it the other way round. As I’m writing this, I’m thinking, ‘honestly, you are so shallow!’ and wondering if this is just society’s conditioning that makes me think like that but no, sorry, just can’t see it.

What I can understand is the attraction of power, money and influence because, invariably, with those things comes an awful lot of self-assurance and that, in itself, can be extremely appealing. I can imagine a young girl being completely over-whelmed by a rich lifestyle – the yachts, the travel, private planes and parties with the rich and famous; childhood stories like Cinderella and films such as Pretty Woman have much to answer for. The young, beautiful but poor girl who finds a life time of happiness with her prince? We know it well of course. In some stories the girl had to kiss a frog to get her prince but she always got him in the end!

Pretty womanI can’t help but think that these stories that all us women hear from a very young age are the reason why so many of us have utterly realistic expectations when it comes to relationships with men. We are looking for the rich and powerful man to sweep us off our feet (literally and metaphorically), to worship us and keep us cocooned in a world of adoration and luxury. Realistically, we all know that it’s a dream and the feminist in all of us will publicly rile against it but I genuinely believe in all of us there lingers a secret desire to be Cinderella (or Julia Roberts).

With men, there is an inbuilt instinct to procreate and a young, fit and healthy woman is a better choice than someone older and past their physical prime but are men really so one dimensional that they cannot move beyond their base instincts? No I don’t think so. Perhaps it’s back to Cinderella and some men want to be the Prince in the story and sweep a young, poor girl off her feet and into a life of luxury; the desire for adoration works both ways I’m guessing. Actually, thinking about it, maybe it’s less a case of Cinderella and more James Bond, the ultimate man’s man who always got the girl. James bond

Perhaps it’s just the case that, as the cynics would claim, that the young women are gold-diggers and the old men are in the midst of a protracted mid-life crisis but the romantic in me would like to think that there is more to it than that.

All of this is complete guesswork of course so I really would love to hear a guy’s perspective on the subject if any of you can spare 5 minutes to share your thoughts….or experiences ;O)

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